teddwebb
Shit happens every day, but it can always be wiped away…
I Can Make it Better…I Can Fix it Better…
I Can Fix It Better!
As a man, or maybe as a perfectionist with OCD, or maybe just as an idiot, the "when something is fixed enough line" remains elusive to me to this very day. “When Something is Fixed Enough” is simply a concept that my brain cannot grasp apparently.
I cannot even remember how many really cool "things" that I really, REALLY did fix, honestly, originally. But alas, the old "you can make that better" or "you can fix that better" demon weasels its way into my mind, or it was always there – it’s hard to say. And I begin down that doomed spiral of self-delusion and fatal denial as I "make it better and fix it better" until the point that even if I HAD FIXED IT, there would be no point claiming to have fixed it, and I would be made the liar and a fool by such claims because I have now broken it even more so than it was ORIGINALLY broken! So, I have always been “doomed” to the “Guy Who Can’t Fix Shit” title.
I’ve watched other people fix stuff. And I have helped other people fix stuff. And they ALL know “when something is fixed enough” and they STOP me from “trying to make it better.” I’ve gotten better in the past few years actually. Sheri will help ‘Supervise’ me and when I actually have fixed it, she won’t let me try “to make it better,” no matter how desperately, no matter how badly I want to try. She is smart and has become wise over the years, and she has saved us a lot of money from not always having to replace everything because I destroy it beyond all repairs.
It is always embarrassing when someone else points out the fact that I did not completely fix something. I underestimated that damn, mysterious “when something is fixed enough” line and erred too far on the side of caution and only “just barely fixed” it. I hate fixing shit sometimes. I just don’t understand why my “make it better” enhancements so rarely meet the original manufacturer’s specifications and guidelines…
>ð|~@-@~|ð<
HiccaBurpFartSneeze
HiccaBurpFartSneeze
A wise friend once told me, “Whatever you do, if you’re in the middle of burping and you all of a sudden have the uncontrollable urge to sneeze, STOP DOING ONE OR THE OTHER.”
Wanting to return the favor and offer some advice of my own, I replied:
Ah! The old "SneezaBurp!"
We all know that the most PAINFUL one though is the “HiccaBurpFartSneeze!”
You know, it’s kind of like:
Painful hiccup –mini-fart… …painful hiccup–mini-fart… …burp …aahhhchooooooeeeeeeblurrp <Hyper-Speed-Air-CuttingGunPressure Fart ComesFromNoWhere And Cuts AND BlowsANewHoleOutYourAss At 1000 Times The Speed Of Sound> …..eeeeeeee….. big – agonizing – burst -your – esophagus – burp – bubble..{perhaps a shart at the apex of your sneeze and farting, or shitting your drawers} …eeeeeee… tear the lining of your lungs kind of sneeze… …followed immediately by a second painful sneeze usually…{depending upon how drunk you are, at this point, you may actually shit yourself from laughter at the fact that are actually in the middle of a "HiccaBurpFartSneeze"}… …and a very, very rare few, sometimes a third!!!
I don’t try to control or mute my sneezes. I just let them fly freely. Perhaps that explains why I have shit myself in public so many times?
Her advice is probably a better route to follow over mine.
>ð|~@-@~|ð<
No Cab Rides…
Sheri always has the right words to console me.
She simply sent me an email that said, “Psalm 91 is a good read.” Yeah, no Cab Rides today, and probably never will be any Cab Rides, but DAMN IT, I Freakin Hurt and I need to VENT and I want the pain to stop!
>ð|~@-@~|ð<
The End Is Really HERE ? ? ?
The End Is REALLY HERE! Bring Out Your FREAKIN DEAD PEOPLE!!!
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/01/05/dead-birds-fall-from-sky-_n_804591.html
“Millions of dead fish surfaced in Maryland’s Chesapeake Bay in the U.S., Tuesday, while similar unexplained mass fish deaths occurred across the world in Brazil and New Zealand. On Wednesday, 50 birds were found dead on a street in Sweden. The news come after recent reports of mysterious massive bird and fish deaths days prior in Arkansas and Louisiana.
The Baltimore Sun reports that an estimated 2 million fish were found dead in the Chesapeake Bay, mostly adult spot with some juvenile croakers in the mix, as well. Maryland Department of the Environment spokesperson Dawn Stoltzfus says "cold-water stress" is believed to be the culprit. She told The Sun that similar large winter fish deaths were documented in 1976 and 1980.
ParanaOnline reports that 100 tons of sardines, croaker and catfish have washed up in Brazilian fishing towns since last Thursday. The cause of the deaths is unknown, with an imbalance in the environment, chemical pollution, or accidental release from a fishing boat all suggested by local officials.
In New Zealand, hundreds of dead snapper fish washed up on Coromandel Peninsula beaches, many found with their eyes missing, The New Zealand Herald reports. A Department of Conservation official allegedly claims the fish were starving due to weather conditions.”
OK, W T F ? ? ?
I have a couple theories. It’s kinda like assholes; everyone has one! LOL!!!
Let’s get “Old School Biblical” on this bad boy…The Sixth Seal was opened and there were a bunch of earthquakes. Well, in the past few years, there have a buttload of earthquakes and almost a million people have died, millions more injured, countless millions lost their jobs and made to suffer, billions of dollars lost which ultimately made people suffer due to economic impact…the Sun turned black…On August 1, 2010, an entire hemisphere of the sun erupted. NASA has no idea the impact on the solar system….the stars of heaven fell to earth…there’s a close earth asteroid headed straight for us and NASA Scientists “think” it’s going to miss us by less than 30 miles, hopefully, they “think”…The First Trumpet…the earth was burned up and all the green grass was burned up…well the entire planet’s temperature is rising and we are all in a serious drought and people are starving to death…The Second Trumpet…a great mountain ablaze…wasn’t there some strange volcano that erupted and covered the earth in ash and stopped all air traffic in Europe?…The Third Trumpet…Wormwood made the waters bitter…millions of fish ending up dead in the seas all over the world???
Now let’s go “Conspiracy Theory” on it…mwahahahahaha…Government Cover Up…there’s big money controlling the government and there’s been more poison leaked into the ocean and an accident into the atmosphere that the government is covering up so that Big Business wont suffer any losses in revenue and so that the government wont be forced to spend any more money on any “clean up projects”…Scalar Electromagnetic Weapons using Longitudinal Scalar Waves similar to the ones that the Soviet KGB created back in the 60’s and that the CIA has developed that extract energy from empty space and can possibly destroy the entire planet if not properly used or if they fall into the wrong hands, and OUR Government, I think the Secretary of Defense actually gave a speech on the threat of terrorism using these type of weapons and that we must take every effort to protect ourselves against them – that bill was not voted into law by Congress…Weather Modifying Weapons…For the 2008 Olympics, China had 30 airplanes, 4,000 rocket launchers, and 7,000 anti-aircraft guns to stop rain. Each system would shoot various chemicals into any threatening clouds to shrink rain drops before they reach the stadium – granted, that’s pretty low-tech, but have you ever heard of the Weather Mitigation Advisory and Research Board?…it was a second bill that was voted down, but many believe that Bush moved forward with it anyway so they could research weather control, for things such as hail cannons (all those birds look like they were pummeled with hail???)…or what about HAARP?… The High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program (HAARP) is an
“ionospheric research program jointly funded by the US Air Force, the US Navy, the University of Alaska and the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA). Its purpose is to analyze the ionosphere and investigate the potential for developing ionospheric enhancement technology for radio communications and surveillance purposes (such as missile detection). The HAARP program operates a major Arctic facility, known as the HAARP Research Station, on an Air Force owned site near Gakona, Alaska. The most prominent instrument at the HAARP Station is the Ionospheric Research Instrument (IRI), a high power radio frequency transmitter facility operating in the high frequency (HF) band. The IRI is used to temporarily excite a limited area of the ionosphere. Other instruments, such as a VHF and a UHF radar, a fluxgate magnetometer, a digisonde and an induction magnetometer, are used to study the physical processes that occur in the excited region”
…I’m not really sure about messing around with our ionosphere, a fundamental protective layer of our planet, but hey, that’s just me…
So, the way I see it…
THE END IS NEAR!!!
OR
BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING!!!
OR
THEY ARE OUT TO GET ME MAN!!!
OR
SO LONG AND THANKS FOR ALL THE FISH!!!
>ð|~@-@~|ð<
THE END IS NEAR
The End Is Near!
THE END IS NEAR! BRING OUT YOUR DEAD! THE END IS NEAR!! LOL!!!
http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/01/03/what-made-thousands-of-birds-fall-from-the-sky/?hpt=T2
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/01/04/birds-fall-from-sky-louisiana_n_804196.html
Seriously though, I’m a bit freaked out Man!
12/26/2004: India: We have that MASSIVE earthquake that causes that MASSIVE tsunami that kills around 275,000 people in India, 128,000 people still "missing" (aka dead), 1.5 million people left homeless
12/26/2004: Sunda Trench, Simeulue Island (near epicenter of earthquake): 6,300 people killed by that earthquake that CAUSED that tsunami and 4,600 people still "missing" (aka dead), about 1,000 people killed in total along the 22 misc tiny, little islands and Japan (mostly children tourists), and about 8,000 people left homeless and 5,000 boats (jobs) destroyed
12/26/2004: Near Northern Sumatra (very close to epicenter), (Sri Lanka: 35,300 killed, 5,700 “missing” (aka dead), 23,000 people injured, 648,000 left homeless), (Thailand: 47,000 people killed, 2,800 people “missing” (aka dead), 8,500 people injured, 7,000 people left homeless), (Somalia + Burma + Malaysia + Tanzania + South Africa + Yemen + Kenya: 54,000 people killed, 45,000 people “missing” (aka dead), 125,000 people injured, 1.7 MILLION left homeless)
10/08/2005: Pakistan, 86,000 people killed, 69,000 injured, 4.5 Million left homeless
05/12/2008: Eastern Sichuan, China, 88,000 people killed, 5 MILLION people left homeless, 5.4 Million buildings (schools, hospitals, jobs) destroyed, 45 million people effected, 86 BILLION dollars in damage
01/12/2010: Haiti Region: 222,600 people killed, 300,000 people injured, 1.3 Million people left homeless
01/01/2010: Beebe, Arkansas: about 5,000 birds mysteriously drop dead from the sky for no reason. The government sends out CDC in sealed White Suits to pick up the birds and tells the residents to not drink the water, but that there’s really nothing wrong with the water. The government is telling the people obviously ridiculous reasons for the birds deaths
01/04/2010: Louisiana, a highway and area near Pointe Coupee Parish, 300 miles south of Beebe, some 500 birds just drop dead from the sky, most over a half mile stretch of freeway, apparently from some type of trauma
01/04/2010: 100 Miles from Beebe, Arkansas: about 100,000 fish suddenly die for no apparent reason
01/04/2010: Gilbertsville, Kentucky: Hundreds of birds fall dead from the sky for no apparent reason
2012: One of the most accurate calendar that Man has ever created, ENDS
I got so freaked out this morning that I grabbed my Bible and I read Revelations again…for like the 30th time. It’s a toss up between Job and Revelations as to which one I’ve read the most times. It seems that for me, the Bible only consists of two Books: Job and Revelations…that sorta fits my life fairly well too. I guess that’s why I like reading those two Books. I think I’ve read Job more than Revelations though. I know that I’ve actually STUDIED Job more than Revelations. I read Revelations like a Book in the Bible. I STUDY Job. I LOVE Job. I ADMIRE Job.
Anyway, THE END IS NEAR!!!
Tedd
>ð|~@-@~|ð<
All Prepared
Well, I’ve not been able to pee for about three days now. That’s not EXACTLY the truth. I can dribble a little bit, but there’s nothing quite as unsatisfying and deeply depressing as walking away from the bathroom with a full bladder because all you could do was “leak a few drops,” and that was a 15 minute endeavor that took all your strength and left you exhausted!
I do not know if anyone actually reads my blog other than my wife. It’s for friends and family to peak into my life and get an update on my health if they want, but people are busy these days and I am probably the most verbose person that I have ever met, and besides I really write because writing is my form of therapy anyway! LOL!!! See, it took all of that for me to just get to the point! If you have ever had a catheter, you know that it is rather painful going in and coming out, and for me, rather painful the entire time it is in, tugging on your ‘innards’ every time you move. I am so desperate right now, that I am seriously considering having Sheri drive me down to the ER to have them put a catheter in to drain my bladder! …almost ready for a catheter, but not quite yet…I will give it another day or so and see if this little problem clears itself up, which happens a lot with me. Yep, MS is a C R A Z Y disease alright! One day you can’t stop your eyes from crossing and the next day, the problem has cleared itself up…one day you have cerebral palsy symptoms and every 2 seconds you see a flash of white light and this lasts for 3 or 4 days and then you wake up one morning and you are back to normal. If I went to the ER every time I had a problem, I would LIVE at the ER!!!
On Wednesday, the 29th, I had to go see this Orthopedic Doctor that I’ve never seen before. I told him that we should really get an MRI of my spine before he did the exam. He did not listen to me and it was an IME exam and I had to do it, so I just “Mustered Up,” “Manned Up,” and went through his torture exam and told him each time where it freakin hurt as he bent and twisted me around. God Almighty! It hurt so bad, but I “Nutted Up” and did it and was very cooperative with the doctor and at the VERY END of the exam, while he was examining the pointless X-Rays, which I had told him that it would be pointless to waste time and money taking X-Rays in the first place – but he didn’t listen to me either, he said, “we really need to get an MRI to see what’s wrong with your back before we can make a firm diagnosis.” Well duh shit you moron! I’ve spent 6 years studying medicine, medical science, specifically, all the medical science that is specific to me and my issues. I can read MRI films accurately on my own, better than the radiologist often, and occasionally I’ve caught stuff that the neurologist has missed. I KNOW what my OWN brain looks like in an MRI…
I’ve spent hundreds of hours looking at ONLY my brain, not countless patients’ brains. I’ve seen my own MRI’s, CT’s, CT Angiograms, MRA’s, X-Rays, EEG’s, ECG’s, for 6 years over and over and over again, examined them, read the reports, watched the progression of my disease and the symptoms and medications, and I even know how to read blood workups. I’ve seen 74 doctors in 6 years. Not a single one of them has seen ALL of my records together to see the full picture and the full history. The ONLY doctor who was actually getting close and using “differential diagnostics,” plus he had Sheri and I doing research on our own since he knew that we had more time to research my specific condition than he did and he would examine what we brought him and determine if it was nothing or if it was something to explore, freakin DIED! He was our “Dr. House!” LOL!!! All the other neurologists are like most doctors. If you point out something they did wrong, or something that they missed, they get pissed off and end the appointment quickly. They don’t want to explore all avenues. They want to stick to the book, whether you fit the book or not, whether or not the treatment the book suggests is working for you. I now know more about headaches, seizures, MS, and reading MRI films than my Neurologist does! And she’s really, really pissed off at me now and doesn’t want to see me anymore. If only I was a freakin doctor!! I could give myself all the tests that I REALLY need to have done and be put on the correct combination of medications that I need. However, my HMO Medical Group won’t pay for the tests I need to have done unless a Neurologist writes a letter stating it is a “medical necessity” and my Neurologist WON’T give me a test that I request because I came up with it and have a theory that she did not think of first!
OK, that’s enough whining and bitching. Wah, wah, wah… Any-who, so ever since this quack Ortho Doctor had his way with my back, twisting and bending me in all sorts of unnatural ways, I’ve not been able to move or lift or bend hardly at all. I bent over yesterday to pick up a screwdriver and I almost screamed out loud because it hurt so bad when I tried to stand up, and then when I tried to walk, my back had other ideas, like ripping my entire lower back into shreds, shattering my right hip, dipping my right leg in hot boiling oil and then paralyzing my right leg so that I could no longer move it at all! I had to take ALL of my pain medication, even the ones that I NEVER take (the narcotics), and I had to take the FULL DOSES of all my other pain medications (I NEVER take the full doses, I always take half doses).
Today, I am All Prepared. I am sitting on a beach towel in case my bladder just randomly unloads while I’m sitting here or during a black-out/pass. I have my empty gallon jug of Crystal Geyser water with the large opening for me to have a larger target to aim at in case I have an uncontrollable bout of the “wee wee’s” and can’t make it to the bathroom in time! I raided my Super Special Emergency Use Only Pain Medication store. I snagged my bottle of Vicoden. I hate that crap. It takes the edge off of pain, but it really doesn’t do all that much more for pain for me than taking 5 or 6 Advil (but with less liver damage). The evil of Vicoden, other than the fact that it doesn’t have much effect on me at all, is that it MAKES ME NOT BE ABLE TO PEE! LOL!!! I do not see how anyone could get addicted to Vicoden. On my body, it has the same effect as taking a handful of aspirin, and I have never developed any desire or addiction to aspirin, or heard of anyone ever getting addicted to aspirin. It has to be a psychological thing. You can probably develop a severe addiction to LIFESAVERS candy!
I’ve also had to pull down the dreaded Indomethacin. It will numb your pain, but it will eat away the lining of your stomach, burn a hole in your intestines, give you liver damage, and decrease the lifetime of your kidneys, but it will ease your pain and that’s a fact! I think Indomethacin is a medication that is given to people whose bones are breaking down, but in people with Multiple Sclerosis, it is given for Emergency Use ONLY for painful migraines. I have discovered that not only does Indomethacin work very good at relieve the sharp slicing, stabbing, throbbing, screaming agony of my migraines, but it also works well for overall body pain, kinda makes you entire body “float.” I usually take a dozen Indomethacin in an entire year!! So far in 2011, I have already taken FOUR Indomethacin.
I started writing this at 11:38 this morning, but it’s taking me over 5 hours to write this. I have had these irritating dozing episodes where I can’t fall asleep, but I’m not awake either. I’m in a waking dream-state. I have hallucinations and dreams when I am in this state and when I come closer to the “awake” part, I suddenly become aware that I have been hallucinating or dreaming. And yes, there is a distinct difference between a hallucination and a dream. When I’m dreaming, it’s just like a dream when you are asleep, exactly like the dreams I have when I am asleep. I have narcolepsy and part of that is my freakish ability to enter REM sleep in an inhumanly fast pace. A hallucination is when I still see my surroundings and am still aware of everything around me, but there are EXTRA components/’things’ AND people dispersed throughout the house. For example, a few minutes ago, I had a hallucination where Sheri was here and I was talking to her about the placement of one of Virge’s toys on his cage and about moving it. Sheri is at work. She did not get up off the couch and go move the toy. THAT was a hallucination and when I came back to my wake state, I realized that. It used to freak me out, but I’m used to it now.
Ah, let the pain medication flow freely…bring on the Morphine Baby! Yeah Baby! Let’s get this party started! Vicoden is for wimps. I have the good shit. I gots me some Morphine homie’s! Yeah Baby, let’s pop some Morphine and ride that smooth wave of pain-free bliss! Oh Wait! I forgot, there’s something freakish in my body that makes it so that Morphine has ZERO effect on my body. You can pump me full of Morphine from now until the cows come home and all it does it make me throw up. It doesn’t do jack shit for my pain. Hell, Morphine won’t even ease a headache. I just keep it in case we have a really bad emergency.
Naw, I’m doin the junkie shuffle Man. I got my eyes set on my stash of Fentanyl Patches. Now THAT’S the Good Shit. It’s 100 times more powerful than Morphine. Yep, it is 100 times more powerful, but it comes with a hefty price in side effects! 😉
I think I will just sit here in pain until Sheri gets home. She will love on me and pet me and make me feel better and help make the pain go away and she will help me see if I am just being a “Drama Queen” or if it would be smart or not to take such drastic measures instead of just holding on a little bit longer to see if it gets better or not. I get confused sometimes these days, well a lot actually, and Sheri helps me to snap my brain back onto track so I can think straight again! Fentanyl is a VERY hardcore narcotic pain reliever so I should wait and talk to her before I just go off and start taking it. That would be smart thing to do. So I’m gonna wait until she gets home. I love Sheri. She helps me get All Prepared most of the time when I am confused and can’t remember or can’t think clearly. And it is very, VERY difficult to think clearly when you are in agonizing pain.
That has become the theme of my life: Pain. I think a lot about getting a cab ride down to the beach and swimming out into the ocean as far as I can and diving down as far as I can, so far that I run out of air and physically can’t swim back to the surface, no matter how hard I try. At first panic and fear will strike, then the realization that my pain is finally going to end and I peacefully give in, and then the agonizing torturous pain of drowning (drowning is not a calm act like you see on TV), then my pain is finally over. I have a couple minutes of agony (so what) to end years and years of pain, and agony. That seems like a pretty good trade to me and I am pretty confident that the amount of pain that I have and will continue to have for the rest of my life will accumulatively outweigh that of those few moments of drowning.
There’s just one little problem…well, a few little problems. Sheri will be devastated if I were to kill myself, even if it were to end a lifetime of pain and suffering. My Mom and Dad would be crushed. I’m their only child. My family would be hurt. They are all strict Southern Baptists and even though I would be ending decades of agonizing pain and suffering and mental degradation, they could never understand. My Friends would all be deeply hurt and saddened. However, Sheri and my Friends, after a short while, after their initial grief and shock had worn off, would come to understand and to a sort of peace with it because they would understand and would rather remember me as “me” and not watch me writhe in agonizing pain for decades and degrade mentally. They would know that I had made peace with God and that my mind was fading away into nothingness and I was no longer going to be “Tedd.” I would mentally cease to even be “Tedd.” I would just be a blank, empty, drooling, semi-conscious lump of flesh who could not speak, only grunt and scream, or move or see or hear, but could only feel agonizing pain and did nothing but scream constantly, even screaming in their brain because no medication could stop the pain and that the thing that used to be “Tedd” was long gone and this lump of flesh was just something that spent day and night screaming in agonizing pain for no reason.
Nope. No cab rides for me today. I am still “Tedd” and I can still remember most of my relatives and long term memories, and I can think fairly well most of the time. Sheri is a Saint among Women! I Love Her So Much and I don’t know what I would do without her. I guess I would be licking a Fentanyl Patch right now instead of putting it on my arm so that I would get the full 72 hour dose all at once in hopes that I would overdose and end this pain right now. Nope, I’m gonna wait until Sheri gets home.
>ð|~@-@~|ð<
I’m Angry at Hallucinated Sheri
I’m one of those people who need time to think over and determine the real impact on me, so I try to curb my “Internal Drama Queen.” I also need time to gather my thoughts so that I can speak intelligently, clearly convey my feelings, and be less “attacking” and more “here’s what happened and here’s how and why that hurt my feelings” in my speaking and choice of words because that’s more productive than just lashing out in raw emotions, which is rarely productive and rarely solves anything. Waiting also gives me time to think about some possible solutions to the problem, and to see any part that is or may be my own fault and how to change my own behavior.
The downside is that I’m angry and “disturbed” for a week or two while I’m working things out in my mind. If I act too quickly, then we just end up hashing out the same thing again later, and things can be said that are hurtful because of being defensive due to the hurtful nature of whatever transgression I have perceived. This causes me to have hurt feelings longer, but the goal is a productive outcome, a positive outcome, so being proactive, allowing time to pass to fully analyze the situation is worth the trade-off.
A few weeks ago, I was having ‘a bad day.’ I had been having Generalized Seizures and Tonic-clonic Seizures all day long. I thought Sheri had decided to stay home with me, but then around lunch time, her boss made her leave me and go into work. I spent the rest of the day having seizures all by myself. I was hurt that Sheri would leave me like that. I understood that she had a job to do, but I also understood that there are certain times when exceptions MUST be made. And when your spouse is having grand mal seizures and other seizures, one-after-another all day long, an exception MUST be made. But Sheri left me. I was so hurt.
I talked to Sheri about this, but I don’t think I was clear. I’d had a few ‘bad days’ in a row, and I was still half out of my gordo, so I’m sure that I wasn’t the clearest person to try to communicate with! LOL!!! Anyway, Sheri never understood what I was talking about. I was so mad at her. She had hurt my feelings badly. Sheri’s under a lot of stress, so I just didn’t want to “jump her” over this, but instead wanted to have time to calm down so I could approach her without it turning into a pointless shouting match (well, loud voices and cursing, but not actually ‘shouting’ or ‘yelling’). We were also looking into Respite Home Healthcare for me and Medical Transportation Services too since I can’t drive myself to doctor’s appointments anymore.
After about 2 weeks, I felt comfortable enough to approach Sheri with this. We talked about it, talked it out. She felt guilty for not staying home with me that day anyway. But by this time, I was clear-headed enough to fully explain what was going on. She said that she wasn’t home at all that day. She had left for work as usual that day because I had started out that day “fine” and not appearing to need anyone to stay home.
I was indeed a bit embarrassed, but more importantly, a Great Sense of relief wafted over me. We laughed about the entire thing. I told Sheri that I wasn’t mad at her anymore. All this time, I had been mad at “Hallucinated Sheri” because the REAL Sheri was at work that entire time!
Damn You Hallucinated Sheri!!!
I Love You, Real Sheri 
>ð|~@-@~|ð<
Treasure Your Cherished Memories
Relish in and Hold on to the Fond Memories You Have with your Loved Ones as Long as you can because you never know when something will happen that will start stealing and stripping your treasured and most cherished memories away.
If you have a Fond Story, then take a few moments and write that Fond Story down so that it can never be forgotten or lost. Write down your Funny Stories or Real-World Lessons for your Future Generations to have something tangible to hold on to. There is a reason Man stopped telling stories ONLY and developed WRITING and began to ALSO WRITE their STORIES down.
This one is just criminal. I have personally known a handful of people who have had “secret recipes” that they never wrote down and never passed on to anyone. For some reason, they were waiting on something. Waiting on what? They all have passed on and instead of being able to make their recipe’s and enjoy them and sit and talk about and remember that person and how much better theirs always was and tell our favorite stories about that person, that person is instead occasionally mentioned. Often, in the context of “remember the blank that so-and-so used to make? I wished they’d written that down.”
If you have a “secret recipe” or a “family recipe,” then take a box of index cards, or get one of those blank books, and just start writing down the recipes and keeping that book with all your other recipe books. No one says that you have to Share that book or those recipes with anyone. However, when you have passed on, it would be nice to have many people making your recipes and remembering you and talking about fond memories of you, than having you occasionally mentioned, and then with a twinge of frustration and anger because you were too stupid and stubborn to share something beautiful with the world, to share your creative genius and artwork with your close friends and family so that a little more of you lives on with them. Or let one of your children or relatives come and visit you from time and time and teach them the recipes and let them write them down if you always just make them and don’t have an actual recipe – that way SOMEONE will know how to make them!
Share your beauty and your legacy with your loved ones left behind and stop being selfish!
Toe Head Tedd
teddwebb 