MRI 09.14.2010
Great News! I have more brain death than ever before! Yeah! And what’s even more exciting boys and girls is that I have entire chunks of my brain that are now dead lumps of stinky rotted meat inside my skull in NEW AREAS where I’ve never had lesions before. Yippy.
My lesions have pretty much always stuck to the same half a dozen areas in my brain and they pop up and go away and pop up and go away. For the most part, they stay gone long enough for my neurons (brain cells) to be able to mostly heal. That way instead of 100% brain death for each lesion, I’m only getting 10% brain death, nice and slow decay, except for my central gyrus where the big boy hit with a fury (that’s why I walk with a cane now).
Whenever I get an MRI Report, I always feel this sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, like I’m going to throw up. I’m both anxious to read the Report and afraid to read the Report. And when I read the Report and I come to sections like this, my heart skips a beat, and sinks. No one ever Expects The Spanish Inquisition! …No one ever Expects Brain Atrophy!
“focal FLAIR hyperintensity in the juxtacortical white matter with involvement of the U-fibers. There is enlargement of the adjacent sulci, compatible with focal atrophy….hyperintense lesion at the level of the left pericallosal white matter adjacent to the genu of the corpus callosum…”
Yummy! Brains…brains…cold, dead, non-functioning, rotten, but stuck, trapped inside my skull brains… I need a “nano-zombie” to go in there and clean up all that yucky mess! LOL!!!
When I got my first “black hole” (that’s what we call those little black spots on your MRI ‘atrophy’ that should be nice, happy, smart, living brain matter, but instead is just black, dead brain cells), it hit me really hard. I broke down, sobbing uncontrollably. It’s not every day that you look at an image of your brain and you see a spot that should be alive and thinking, but instead it’s dead and once brain cells, neurons die, they NEVER grow back. I’ve had a few more smaller black holes here and there, but not as big as my first one. However on this MRI, there are half a dozen or so. I didn’t even finish looking through all the films on the CD. I just stopped half way through. I didn’t want to see any more. There’s no point.
That’s funny because Dr. Clarke said the same thing when I asked her about getting an MRI more often. She said there’s no point. What good is it going to do? So we don’t catch your brain when it’s in a highly active period. So what? If we did, there’s nothing that we could do because the ONLY treatment that you can do when you have a flair up of lesions is steroid infusions and guess who’s allergic to steroids? Yep, me. Isn’t that a bitch? The only treatment available that “may” help slow down the lesions, is a treatment that I’m allergic to and made me go half blind when they infused me with them in the beginning before we all knew that I was allergic to steroids! LOL!!!
Anyway, there’s the latest news on the MRI. A couple new lesions and half a dozen or so new chunks of brain death. I’m a little bit more senile today than I was yesterday. I’m 38 and I have dementia and am getting as senile as an old man 
>ð|~@-@~|ð<
teddwebb 